One of my kids favorite activities is to ride in the car with me. It really doesn’t matter where we are going. A trip to Home Depot is just as good to them as a trip to the mall. The reason is that it’s their time to talk with me one-on-one. Usually, the car doesn’t even make it out of the driveway before our conversation begins. Our talks are often filled with laughter, but can sometimes be sad when things haven’t gone well in their life. These dialogues are great places for them to ask me questions that have been on their mind, or to simply tell me tales from the lunchroom. They are times to wonder and dream out loud together as well as remind each other of what’s really important. I wouldn’t miss one of those conversations for anything. Afterward, I always feel very loved and I think my children do too.
When people think about prayer they rarely think about a conversation with their Heavenly Father that looks anything like the ones I have with my kids in the car. Often, for us, prayer seems formal, possibly even formulaic or ritualistic. Sometimes prayer can actually make us feel more distant from God. Depending on our spiritual history, our mental picture of prayer can look like written prayers we repeat again and again, spiritual speeches we give to others in the name of God, poems about God we say before bed or even a moment of silent reflection. Somehow these things can seem more “normal” to us than having a conversation with God. Maybe it’s just hard to believe that God actually wants to relationally connect with us. Jesus calls us to pray in a way that fully engages our heart and mind.
“And when you pray, do not be like the hypocrites, for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by men. I tell you the truth, they have received their reward in full. But when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you. And when you pray, do not keep on babbling like pagans, for they think they will be heard because of their many words. Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask him.” – Matthew 6.5-8
I come away with a couple big principles from this passage.
1. Prayer isn’t a speech – God isn’t looking for us to impress or instruct our friends by praying in front of them. In fact, it kind of turns Him off. I have been in countless small groups or Christian gatherings where someone stands up and prays a long, well-worded speech that starts off talking to God but ends up talking to us in the guise of talking to God. We really shouldn’t do that, rather we should…
- Keep our prayers focused on God
- Speak from our heart
- Be more concerned about the beauty of God than the beauty of our words
2. Prayer isn’t a mantra – God isn’t looking for us to repeat spiritual incantations over and over again designed to get Him to act on our behalf. He really isn’t looking for us to pray endlessly without a point either. I don’t know if God gets bored, but if He does – this would do it.
It is when we begin to understand prayer as a conversation with God that our experience of prayer changes. Prayer is our time to talk with our Father in Heaven, to laugh with Him about the silly parts of our day, to cry with Him when our heart is broken, to dream with Him about our hopes for the future and to remember what is really important. Our relationship with God is like any other relationship we have. Prayer is our way to connect relationally with Him. When we are able to make the leap to conversational prayer we find that God wants to communicate to us as well. He wants to guide us, inspire us, love us, forgive us and help us. Without conversational prayer our experience of these things becomes little more than an idea we hold on to instead of a reality we walk in. God wants so much more for us than that.
What has been your experience of prayer? How has it shaped your faith?
This week, I am going to be answering a question or two about prayer on my blog every day this week. Also, to help people develop a greater prayer life, I will be picking 10 people at random from among the comments left this week to receive a free copy of ‘Too Busy Not To Pray’ by Bill Hybels.
Amy posted on October 5, 2009
Prayer is an important part of my life – it keeps me focused on God throughout the day and keeps my faith at the forefront of my mind. Often though I feel like I need to prayer for the same things over and over – forgetting that God is bigger than any prayer I can pray and that God is in control, not my prayers.