Friday October 09, 2009

 
7

How to have a great prayer time with your small group

 

Small groups can be one of the most fun and impacting aspects of being in a church. Small groups give us the opportunity to share what’s going on in our lives in a safe and loving setting. It’s a place where we can pray for others and have them pray for us. Praying in a group is different than praying by ourselves. It can be a little daunting, especially when we are a newer Christian or when we don’t know the other members of the group particularly well. Here are some tips to help make small group prayer times a great experience.

Be authentic – It is important to keep it real when we offer requests or pray for others. Subtle, unintended hypocrisy can damage trust.

Be transparent – It’s crucial to move past the relational surface and share some of the deeper issues or challenges we face. It is also important to dive deep as we pray for others.

Be simple – We should keep our words simple and use ‘Christian’ slang sparingly. Speaking in a straight-forward way helps others to have the confidence to pray.

Be focused – Prayers and requests need to have a point. It is hard for people to relate to us or pray for us when we aren’t able to articulate a clear thought. The same is also true when we pray.

Be loving – Prayer times are moments of great and fragile vulnerability that need to be handled with great compassion. We need to love people as we share our requests and as we pray for them. Prayer is not a time to rebuke or correct others.

Be brief – No one gets too excited about long, droning prayers except the person praying. Extended prayers are best used in our devotional times and not in group settings.

Be God-centered – Prayer is a conversation with God. It’s not an opportunity to preach to the group. We need to adjust our words and hearts to Him.

I’m curious to know what your experience of prayer has been in a small group. What are some other pieces of advice that you would offer to others?

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Category: Re-Imagining Life, Rethinking Church

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COMMENTS

  1. Julie posted on October 9, 2009

    Sometimes prayer at the end can be so brief it feels like we just do it to say we did it. Does prayer in small group always need to be brief? I feel like our group has experienced some powerful moments when we extend prayer and make it more intentional than just quick sentences lifting up our requests to him. thoughts?

    1. Scott

      Scott posted on October 9, 2009

      Good thoughts – I was meaning brief not in relationship to the length of the prayer time itself, but more as a guideline for each persons prayer. Times of prayer should go as long as they are meaningful. Both brief, perfunctory, passionless prayer times and long, meandering prayer times can often be frustrating. Group prayer is about passionate, thoughtful prayer that is genuinely inclusive to every member of the group. When people begin to wander or lose focus it probably is time to wrap it up. Short shallow prayer doesn’t do it for me either, but neither does feeling captive for long periods of time listening to people repeat themselves. How have you kept your group’s extended times of prayer impacting? Any practical suggestions?

      1. Julie posted on October 10, 2009

        I think that the times we are most authentic in our prayer requests tend to be the most impacting and meaningful extended prayer times we’ve had. We are a group of gals that really love each other so when we share deeper personal prayer needs vs. feeling better from the flu (not that that’s bad to pray for) we feel a strong bond to come together and lift that up to God. I feel you on the captive comment. So a practical tip: be the first bold one in your small group to share the thing that’s really been eating at you for a long time and needs prayer but you’re scared to share it…step out in faith…be real about it!

        1. Julie posted on October 10, 2009

          you’ll be surprised to see how much it creates a place for others in your group to all of a sudden feel a freedom to be real about their struggles/needs as well.

          1. Scott

            Scott posted on October 10, 2009

            Rock on

            1. Chuck Lee posted on October 11, 2009

              Every true prayer has its background and its foreground. The foreground of prayer is the intense, immediate desire for a certain blessing which seems to be absolutely necessary for the soul to have; the background of prayer is the quiet, earnest desire that the will of God, whatever it may be, should be done. What a picture is the perfect prayer of Jesus in Gethsemane! In front burns the strong desire to escape death and to live; but behind there stands, calm and strong, the craving of the whole life for the doing of the will of God… Leave out the foreground, let there be no expression of the will of him who prays, and there is left a pure submission which is almost fatalism. Leave out the background, let there be no acceptance of the will of God, and the prayer is only an expression of self-will, a petulant claiming of the uncorrected choice of him who prays. Only when the two are there together, the special desire resting on the universal submission, the universal submission opening into the special desire, is the picture perfect and the prayer complete.

              1. Scott

                Scott posted on October 16, 2009

                deep stuff Chuck – very thought provoking

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